Africans mothers and ways around them

The most difficult job you can ever accept is not working as a banker on the island and living in the mainland. Rather, it is being a child of an African mother, most especially Nigerian mothers. Whether ibo or yoruba or even hausa, they are all talented. I bet they all have general meetings before birthing us because I wonder why they act the same way. If you hear African mothers,don't try to think of their salvage responses, only if you want to start crying. But in a way, they have dominant genes in certain areas.     1) Story teller mothers Mothers like this always want you around them to hear story. You would hear about when your dad proposed, what Mama silika did to them and why they won't forgive her. You will even get bored because they would repeat what they told you when you were two years old over and over again until forever. Having mothers like these is synonymous to going out often. Because you have to run away from their torments. Except you have enough time to spend listening to the 80s stories.       2) Lie detectors mothers If you have mothers like these, then you would either be, ajebutter( this means you don't mingle or go out) or you are a detector yourself. These mothers practically know what lies smell like and can catch you in the hand. To overcome such mothers, you need extra super heroes powers to cover up your trails else, it won't be a pretty sight.     3) Complainers Before I start talking about these people, remember not to be like them as a lady. I repeat, don't be like them! You are in the 21st century. These mothers start with 
  • 'You cannot carry the bucket to the sink', why will you slap your younger sister, is that how I brought you up?' 
  • 'Who scattered my bed oo, I laid it before leaving,I don't know why my children will not arrange my bed but enjoy scattering it', 
  • 'Daddy Tayo!!!, these children didn't wash the bathroom, what else can we do to bring them up rightly?'.
They would go on until their chest starts giving them signals to stop. If you have such mothers, your best way out is by getting ear puffs. Either you do that or you get an headphones or borrow earpiece if not, you would be dreaming of their screams. Naturally, you can't stop them so you have to help your ear by looking for a lasting solut     4) Errand senders  This is peculiar to all mothers. They would call you from upstairs to get a remote that is right at their arm stretch. Is that not evil? This can be very frustrating for African children so what do we do to address this issue? Well, all we can do is grow up fast! Wait, Did u think I wanted to advice you to run away? No! If you run, you will have to keep running all your life. So unfortunately, they beat us here.         5) Panel beaters You have to take in all instructions carefully if you don't want slap. I wonder if they were all trained to slap or it is just part of the title of 'African mothers'. 'Don't go there!'. Just listen and don't go because the repercussion might turn you into a rice sack.       6) Lazy/ I don't care ones Mothers like these are easy to push around. They won't probe you on where you really went to, instead they would help you to cover it up well. They just act indifferent and like they are tired of life but don't overpass your boundary if you are not expecting the other side they carry.  Drop the number your mother falls into in the comment below.